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Sunday, February 8, 2009

Gung Ho!!

My weight has gone up and down more than Ms. Oprah.

But, once in my life, (believe it or not): I was a Weight Watcher's Group Leader/Lecturer.

For about three months.

Then, I got pregnant (that's what I got for lookin' good!) and it was the excuse I needed to eat again. (So what if that baby is now 30 years old, NEVER MIND!) I never returned to be a WW Lecturer again.

But, one of my most embarassing moments was when I was a Lecturer for Weight Watchers.

Now, normally, Weight Watchers' corporate office gave all Group Leaders/Lecturers worldwide the same weekly "theme" and as a leader, you were supposed to supplement that week's theme with an accompanying short lecture, advice or a personal "cheerleading" speech to help the group continue to eat their carrots (and not chocolate cake) for the upcoming week.

So, being the bright-eyed, newly-thin, new Group Leader I was, I start to tell them how you have to get excited...REALLY excited.... and committed... about losing weight in order to be successful.
I kept telling the audience (of about 45 people) that you have to go GUNG HO! about the weight-loss process. All the way. No half-way attempts.

I kept using this expression (Gung Ho!) to describe the enthusiasm one needs to clear the house of sweets, and get the proper measuring equipment (food scales, measuring cups, etc.) to watch portion control, etc.

There were about 4 men there. (I am sure their wives dragged them to the Weight Watcher's meetings by force).

The more I talked the more they'd snicker. Some would actually squirm a little, the further I got into the lecture. I kept smiling at them and kept my enthusiasm up and then finally ended the lecture. On the way out, one of the men approached me somewhat timidly, but then finally smiling.

"Can I help you?" I asked him.

"Umm...I just want you to know that you were the most entertaining speaker I have heard in a while," he states.

I felt shamelessly flattered.

Until he went on:

"But....I THINK the expression you MEANT to say was "GUNG HO", right?

I nod.

He says, (laughing now). "Well, the whole time, you said: "GO HUNG" instead."

He laughs his ass off all the way out the door.

No one else said a word.

The trauma has caused me to continually gain weight again.

(That's my story, and I'm sticking with it.)


Rick (Ratty) said...

That story was great. It was so funny that I only cringed a little at the end. I think your scale at the top is the same brand I use.:)

Insanitykim said...

Ya know what? I think he was just yankin' your chain...either way blame him for the trauma...I am sure he is out there, somewhere, suffering from a fiery case of hemorrhoids for his evil joke!

hippo said...

Yes! Way to go, Go Hung!!!HAHAHAHA!

rainfield61 said...

Very interesting story that I have read today. It should be another joke that I read your story for at least 5 times but I cannot get the point until the last one, "Go Hung" and ""Gung Ho".
Thanks for the sharing.

The Retired One said...

Ratty: Don't cringe. You can't take good pictures for your blog if you cringe.

Insanity Kim: Yeah, we can only hope. Just learn from me, and NEVER use the expression: Gung Ho! lest you make the same mistake.

Hippomandak: Yep. Sometimes when my husband was ready for a big meeting at work, when he went out the door I'd say: "Don't forget to go hung." At least it made him laugh.

Ranifield61: You are new! Thanks for stopping by to read my blog and commenting.You had to read the story FIVE times (before getting it?). I'd have drawn a picture, but that would just be gross. ha

Anonymous said...

This post is evil. Why? Because now when the urge to say "Gung Ho", which comes up in normal conversation regularly, like the word "bowels" or "taxation" does, I shall now have the subliminal urge to say "Go Hung".

The Retired One said...

Kearsie: I know. I cannot EVER use the expression ever, ever, ever again, because it is like a mind fart. I can't ever get it right. Even when I typed out the blog post, when I sent to type out Gung Ho, I would start to type out GO HUNG. Lord, there must be some medication for my condition somewhere. Sorry to have cursed you. Evidently, the condition is contagious.

Sara said...

That was a funny story. At least you had there attention!

I weird tagged you on my site. It is just something fun. You do not have to it, if you don't want too.

Anonymous said...

Hi Lady! How have you been? As a teenager I was a hefty 200 lbs then at age 17 moved into my father and stepmoms, my step mom put me on weight watchers, taught me to eat healthier and I went from a sz 20 to a 5 in one year. Over the years I stayed about 125, a sz 10 is a healthy sz for me. A year or more ago I gained 30 lbs in 3 months while on Prednisone and I have been stuck at 160 since! - I think you read it in my blog.
Truthfully, when I was a sz 5 and even a 1 I didnt feel healthy, it was TOO thin.

Aria said...

I would have had to sit at the back and fling rubber-bands at you for being so peppy... Aside from that, How Horrible for you! People think it's crap about the statistic where public speaking is the number one fear of human beings. This is a great example of why... Not me though, I'll be great when I go on Oprah! LOLOLOL

The Retired One said...

Sara: Yep, I had their a Weight Watcher-Porn kinda way. ha A tag? Cool! I will pop over to your site and get to it again in my blog sometime this week. Thanks,honey!

Hey All: Wow..I never made it to size 5,only Size 8 (for about 5 minutes). That Prednisone is a bitch, but at least it helps the inflammation not be so bad. It is better to feel good than to look good,right?

Aria: I didn't forget about your tag, either. Gotta get my butt in gear and do a post on it. Rubber bands thrown at me might have helped wake me up to realize not to tell men to "go hung"!
Through the years, I ended up (in my career) doing many, many presentations. And, believe it (or not) I didn't even get nervous about doing that after a while....I just never (NEVER!) used that expression again. So, remember not to use it when you meet Oprah. (You'll be too busy telling yourself not to say f***. *wink*) I'll be there saying a Novena or something for you......

jessica said...

I read this, then had to share the jist of it with a co-worker. We both laughed until our eyes were watering. Go Hung, indeed! I see that you have read some of my listed faves, such as Boobs, Injuries and Dr. Pepper. I stumbled across those quite a while ago. Lately it is all I can do to keep posting on my own blog. I think I am having "buyer's remorse", if you catch my drift. Emotions are a bitch to deal with. Later, 'cuz.

The Retired One said...

Hey Jess!
Yup. One of my better moments. At least you can count on my blunders to keep your co-workers in stitches. I forgot another classic one that is right up there, too. Hopefully I can blog about it yet this week. I didn't know you read BI&DP too. God she is witty! I am addicted. I will keep reading your posts, its fun! Don't worry about the buyer's remorse, it is common when there haven't been any "sales" lately(*wink wink*). Take it a day at a time and follow your heart. And for God's sake, be careful on your bike. Looked like you ran into a semi!!!!

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I retired in June 2008 and started my blog in November 2008. I worked at several jobs as a Registered Nurse prior to retirement. I LOVE being retired! Blogging has offered me a whole new venue to start writing again and to share new hobbies such as gardening, birdwatching and sharing my nature photography. If you like my blog, PLEASE click on "follow this blog". Having a lot of followers reading my blog gives me incentive to continue to do photography and to continue to write. I also LOVE comments, so I encourage you to leave me a comment after you read my posts. Thanks everyone, for taking the time to read me!!

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