What would Freud Say????

Husband: "I had a really weird dream last night".
Me: "I thought you said you hardly ever remember your dreams?"

Husband: "This one was just so weird, I had to tell you about it".
Me: "Was it scary?"

Husband: "No.....(pause)......"Just so................................... weird."
Me: "?"

Husband: (pause continuing)
Me: "So, are you going to tell me about it?"

Husband: "ok, I guess...just as long as it doesn't end up in your blog or something."
Me: (Pause) (followed by me, looking up at the ceiling, whistling, picking lint off my robe, anything but provide eye-contact) (followed by: l-----o---n---ggggg pause again)

Husband: "Ok...here goes....":
"There were these cute little birds.....but the weird thing is that they were playing baseball."
Me: "Did you say:................playing BASEBALL???"

Husband: "Yeah. They were all at the bases and everything. What's even weirder is that they had on these cute little baseball caps. They had little bird-sized bats and everything."
Me: (thoughts, not out loud: Holy Shit, he's losing it!) Outloud: "That's interesting, I wonder why you dreamt about something so weird?!"

Husband: (Pause)
Me: (Longer Pause)

Me again: (as an afterthought, out loud): "Did the birds run to the bases or fly to the bases when they got a hit?"

Husband: (With a serious face, matter-of-factly): "Oh, they kind of did a little of both."
Me: (now getting into it): "So, how could you tell the teams apart? Were they wearing little different colored jerseys?" "Did they give each other high-fives when they got a home-run with their wings? Did they chew tobacco and spit it out?"

Husband: (Now inpatient): "Funny honey, really funny. ................................I don't remember...but it sure was weird. I just had to tell you about it."
Me: "I'll get the dream books out, this should be interesting."

**end of conversation**

My interpretation: (before I looked anything up in my dreams interpretation books. (Yes, I have some...I found them at a rummage sale and we have had some fun using them!)
First, my interpretation:
1. Bat=obviously a penis symbol. At least Freud would say so.
2. Bird=obviously means "a piece of tail" (see where this is going?)
3. Cap=putting a lid on something
4. Bases=tempted to play the bases if something doesn't happen soon.

See, we've been really sick (couped up for many days!) and well, let's say, the ball park hasn't seen any action in a while due to both of us feeling like bird(crap).....

There, ...............................................................dream understood.

So, let's see what the dream books say it meant: (there is more than one book, so if I list more than one meaning, it is because they are all listed):

1. Bat=Books only listed the other kind of bat,with fangs. (Hmm...no mention of a penis symbol. Wouldn't Freud be pissed?)
2. Bird=First book=flying birds denote joy and prosperity. Second book=It is good omen to dream of birds with beautiful plumage (wonder if baseball-cap-wearing-birds fits this?) Third book=the bird is the soul (yikes!)
3. Cap:=First book=you will take part in some festivities. Any sports cap indicates a light outlook in life that will be much help to you. Second book=It is a good sign to dream of wearing a cap, whether you are a man or a woman. (What about if you are a bird?). It goes on: "You will find that your worries will cease and that you will be fortunate in your investments". (Wow, has the stock market heard this? Maybe all of the people at the stock exchange should start wearing baseball caps that say "Just do it?")
4. Bases=nothing in either book. But First Book had baseball=you will be very popular among your friends due to your easygoing ways and charm. Second book had baseball=a baseball game in your dreams assures you of contentment and your cheerfulness will make you a popular companion.

I don't know about you, but I am positive I need to write my own dream interpretation book. I think I am more correct....but hey, maybe we can combine the two ?

I need to fly. Gotta find him and make him sing again in the cage..........................................