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Friday, October 8, 2010

More Dumb State Laws!: Maine!!!

Oh, yes!

It's that time again!

Time for MORE DUMB STATE LAWS....
along
with MY COMMENTS in bold italics.

This time, we are going to look at
the
wonderful state of
MAINE!!!!




Here we go:!!!


1. Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.
Let's hope that never happens in Maine, or anywhere else. And, if my history lessons were correct, it might be more efficient and more of a level playing field if bows and arrows were used rather than shotguns, don't you think? And, if you want to have one culture attack another culture, in Maine...I guess they feel you should be in church to do it.






2.  You may not step out of a plane in flight.
Well, duh!  I say..if they are dumb enough to "step out" during a flight, let 'em do it...just don't stand close enough to the door to get sucked out!!  And don't you wonder why there had to be a law passed in Maine so that people did not do this?  And, um...who would be left alive to prosecute if they broke this law?  (Besides if someone survived to be prosecuted, I think parts of them would land in SEVERAL states, not just Maine....you know...the "splat factor" would probably yield body parts in at least 3 states, wouldn't you think?)
  

3. After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
I LOVE this law!!!  It ought to be passed in every state of the union!!! We have one house here that leaves theirs up all year round!





4.  In Augusta: To stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
No minstrels in Maine!  No romantic proposals with accompanying violin players to make her say yes...how boring is THAT? Maybe it has to do with their cold winters? Maybe their fingers get frozen in position, and no one wants to see THAT!!!





5.  In Biddeford: No person may roller skate on a sidewalk.
What? No violins playing down the street and now no roller skaters???  So where are they SUPPOSED to roller skate then? In the middle of traffic???  I mean they can't just do circles over and over in their driveways, now can they? 



6.  In Freeport: It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window.
How about the 5th floor? First floor? How did they decide on just the second-story windows? Did they do some kind of scientific study that determined that second-story spit causes death to the victim? Can you see the headlines? "Murder by Spit from Second Story Spewer. Eye witnesses said they couldn't identify the perpetrator because of the globs falling into their eyes. Forensic tests indicated that the perp recently had garlic and onions which made the crime that much more heinous.  Police suspect an Italian......"

7.  In South Berwick: It is illegal to park in front of Dunkin Donuts. 
That's right. You go, Maine...there is too much obesity in America.  If you are going to eat those delicious high-calorie fat rolls, you better park at least a block away to walk off some of those calories, you lard arses!!  And you..yes, YOU...the one holding the BISMARK....you...YOU have to park at LEAST two blocks from the Dunkin Donut's door....and you'd better not ask for cream for that coffee, either!!  


8.  In Wells: Advertisements may not be placed in cemeteries.
Now that is some thinking on Maine's part....you don't want all those dead people to be reading those ads and haunting the aisles in all of those stores, now DO we? I mean, the aisles are already crowded enough without all those stiffs bumping into us!!  



****************************************************************
Don't forget to get busy looking for or taking your picture
for
the
OCTOBER FREE PHOTO CONTEST!!!
 
The theme is:
TEXTURES!!!
Enter before midnight, Oct. 31st, 2010
following
You CAN enter a photo you have already published on your blog, 
(I changed that rule).

8 comments:

DJan said...

Number two seems to discriminate against skydivers. I do it all the time! Of course I do have a parachute on! Funny outdated laws, as usual, Joan.

Joanie M said...

funny stuff!!!

The Christmas decorations law! Now that's one they should enforce!

Eva Gallant said...

As a Mainer, I have to say, I don't think they enforche the Christmas decorations law....I've seen some that stay up year round!

Bossy Betty said...

Good thing I read #2. I am taking a trip soon and had planned to get off the plane before anyone else!

Mellodee said...

You can't help but wonder what situations prompted enough consensus to actually get these laws passed. The back stories have got to be a hoot!

COUNTRY GAL said...

WOMEN ! I was laughing my ass off ! You do think and speak like I do thats for sure ! In a small town near us its illegal to walk a pig down main street ! now come on I mean really what if you dressed it up then what is it still a pig or a ugly drag queen !

Pat Tillett said...

Those are always so funny! And so are your comments to them. I'm all for passing that christmas tree light law in my state!

SquirrelQueen said...

OMG, once again these are hilarious! I do like the Christmas decorations law, wish it was a law here.

And what if the Native Americans are just visiting to invite everyone over to the new casino after services? Would the shotguns be justified then?

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I retired in June 2008 and started my blog in November 2008. I worked at several jobs as a Registered Nurse prior to retirement. I LOVE being retired! Blogging has offered me a whole new venue to start writing again and to share new hobbies such as gardening, birdwatching and sharing my nature photography. If you like my blog, PLEASE click on "follow this blog". Having a lot of followers reading my blog gives me incentive to continue to do photography and to continue to write. I also LOVE comments, so I encourage you to leave me a comment after you read my posts. Thanks everyone, for taking the time to read me!!

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