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Thursday, December 17, 2009

Travel Observations

My hubby and I travel well together.

We should....it has been 38+ years that we have gone places together. And happily. We love to travel together!

We like to eat light on the road.

We coordinate our bladder schedules.

We both like to listen to mellow rock or oldies radio stations while driving.

We both have just about the same heat/cold needs inside the car.

We are okay with the same types of hotels and wake-up schedules.

But it got me to thinking of things that always make me wonder about others on the road.

Like:

1. What is UP with the so-many-beanie-babies-in-the-back-window-of-the-car drivers? I have seen about 5 now. Mostly women drivers. Short women drivers. They pass us on the freeway (don't ask me how they can see behind them to do so)...and the back window must have 100+ scrunched up silly Beanie Babies and stuffed animals. Don't you wonder how long it has been since they were washed? My guess is that their families told them they could no longer have those ridiculous midget stuffed animals in the house anymore and so out of desperation, they put them in the back window of their cars. I always thought they were stupid and costly and wondered why someone would collect them. (anyone past 12 that is).
And now to KEEP them after all these years (forcing US to see them too, on the road) is a bit ridiculous. They need to wash them and send them to some third world country for poor kids for Christmas or something...

2. What is UP with the 4 a.m. hotel people? You know the ones! The ones that get up at 3:30 a.m.---take noisy showers, play their TV loud, yell at each other as they get dressed...go out and run their trucks and cars for a half hour beside your room....slam their outside doors about thirty times and then finally get on the road. At 4 A.M.!! Where are they going? And why so early???
Sometimes we check in to our hotel pretty early (6pm)..go out to eat,come back and the hotel parking lot is only 1/2 full....but by 4 a.m. the hotel is full and there must be 20 or so of them who get up at 4 a.m. and leave before we even saw them.
Do they transport illegal aliens or what? Why do they need to travel in complete darkness?

3. What is UP with the high heel wearers on the floor above you? Inevitably, we get a woman who checks in pretty late and walks around, clicking/stomping their high heels until about midnight and then again at 7 a.m.
Are they hookers?
Wonder if they ever heard of taking their shoes off?
Oh, and they always drag their suitcases along the entire length of the floor, too.
Several times.
At least we HOPE that is what they are dragging across the floor. (Shudder).

4. What is UP with the closed-lane-ahead lane chasers? You know the ones. There are signs for ten miles warning you that the road will narrow down to one lane ahead because of upcoming construction.
So, here they come.
The "special ones"....they don't think it means THEM, silly.
So they pass everyone at 100 mph, only to go wait up ahead where the road narrows into one lane with their blinker on, waiting for someone to let them in.
Because they think they are special.
I say we stand firm, people!!
Do NOT let them in.
They were rude to think that the signs pertained to everyone BUT them.
They did NOT follow the rules. Don't you DARE feel sorry for them and let them in now. You only enable their rudeness~ Stop letting them in!!!

5. What is UP with the mysterious "pods" on the many, many trucks traveling across the nation? The unmarked trucks, with tarps covering large, mis-shaped objects under the tarps?
Don't you ever wonder what is under those tarps?
I only have one thing to say about that: MEN IN BLACK and ALIENS.
That's all I am going to say.

6.Sorry ahead of time for any of my readers who smoke but: What is UP with the smokers who don't get that non-smokers really get sick from the smell?
A note to SMOKERS: First, YUCK.
Second: You are going to have leathery skin when you get older and people are going to want to play drums on your face.
Third: You are going to die of cancer of some sort. And soon.
Fourth: Okay, if you insist on sucking that gaseous stinking stick, please do NOT smoke it next to our open hotel windows. We loveeeeeee the fresh, tropical, humid air slowly moving our curtains and providing us with warm breezes...we do NOT enjoy the tunnel of fumes along with it coming into our room.
Can't you find another spot to slowly commit suicide....like wayyyyy on the far side of the parking lot by those scruffy bushes and where no other living being has to put up with it??? Thank you.
Oh, and P.S.: when they offer you a smoke free hotel room and ask you if you smoke, please do not lie. We come after you and we know you lied and that you have been there. Let the sneezing begin.

6. What is UP with the toilet paper holders in hotel rooms?
I swear, you need a secret code along with the nimble fingers of a concert pianist to be able to remove the empty roll and replace it with the new one.
Plus, good luck with getting loose the super-glued toilet paper first-sheet from the rest of the roll to begin to use it.
BTW. I have exercised my pointing finger so that it has muscles that Arnold S. would envy just so I can do a swoop-and-dig-into-the-roll to break the tissues about an inch deep. It is the only survival tip I can give you, short of using palm leaves when you need something after toileting.

7. What is UP with only giving two bathtowels in a hotel room?
Men aren't going to get this. But women KNOW that you need two towels for yourself and one for your hubby. Because we do that hang-down-your-wet-hair-and-wrap-it-up-in-a-towel-like-a-Sultan thing with ONE of the towels and of course we need the second one for our bodies.
We do NOT want to wrap our wet hair in the same towel that just cleaned our butts.
So, please hotel owners, provide three or four BATH towels in each room? (Those little hand towels don't cut it, they won't wrap around our fat heads!!)
************************************************************************************
I am still working on downloading my vacation photos to my computer. I am frustrated! But I WILL get them and I will post them as soon as I can. I may have to sell my house, its contents and maybe a grandchild or two to pay someone to help me, but I gotta fix the problem. Being a photographer and not being able to download pictures is the most horrible sentence EVER.

Guess I better ask Santa to help me????

34 comments:

DJan said...

These are just great! And thanks for all the comments (I see you are getting caught up). I especially related to #4 and #6 -- it really irks me to have to let somebody in who ignored the signs. And some hotels are now not allowing ANY smoking inside them for the reasons you mentioned. Oh, and when we stay in a hotel, we go to the top so we don't have anybody over our heads doing who knows what? I also find that spending a couple extra dollars and getting a better hotel room sometimes is really worth it! They give you more than two towels. Great post, welcome back!!

The Retired One said...

DJan: We stayed at different priced hotels on our trip, and some of these things happened at the more pricey ones. Staying on the top floors might help, that is a good idea, however I hate hauling our suitcases, etc. up elevators. I always ask for ground floor due to my fibromyalagia (hauling things out of the car is a pain), so that is probably at the root of my problems with what I listed. ha It is odd, some of the hotels that we paid the most for only gave two big towels. I am sure I could have asked for more and they would have gladly given me more. :-} I also think hotels are trying to save expenses and go green so they are conserving on the towels, etc. Can't blame them and it is a good idea. I am just spoiled. (grin)

Loree said...

I loved the comments about wrapping towels around our fat heads. Or maybe they're just big heads ;)

Sue said...

You hit my ultimate sore spot with #4---I HATE those people. And ya wanna know who lets those people cut in???? MY HUSBAND!!! I get sooooo pissed at him for letting them in. Me--I won't do it, and I give them the middle-fingered salute to boot. He just dies of embarrasment. Personally, I wish Handy (our truck) had a missile launcher!!

Jeanette said...

Great post! In response to some:

1) Those beanie babies and various stuffed animals always look sad to me for some reason.

2) When we travel we are often up early to get started but always we are as quiet as we can possibly be!

3) (shudder!)

4) I NEVER let them in and they make me wish I drove a tank so I could just ram into them!

5) LOL!!

6) As for smoking at least Michigan finally got with the picture and will be for the most part smoke free in May. I quit smoking 17 years ago and absolutely hate it now!

As always I look forward to your pictures!

Alan Burnett said...

Entertaining travelers' tales. Good fun, as always.

ashley folkema said...

Ha Ha Ha Thank you for sharing! These are too funny. And I totally agree with them. Iti s amazing what you realize and think about when you travel. Glad you guys are enjoying your travels. :)

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati said...

I am so with you on the lane chasers one!! I never ever give them way but some soft-hearted bozo in front or behind does and that really gets to me!!

Eva Gallant said...

Hubby and I as you recall had a 30 day trip in Sept. and Oct. and second those. Most especially those drivers that ignore the "right lane closed ahead" signs!

Jientje said...

But I love your writing too and this was a very fun post! I love your sense of humor! Good luck with the pictures!

By the way thanks for the pumpkin pie recipe!!!

Brian Miller said...

#4 totally irks me...

lol. sounds like you have had a bit of fun int he hotel between the TP and the towels...

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Hi There, Like DJan, I relate mostly to #4 and #6... I also get sick and tired of pokey people driving in the left lane on the interstate. Good Gosh--that is a "passing lane"... Pass someone and then get back over in the right lane!!!!

We do a fair amount of traveling and ALWAYS stay in a Holiday Inn Express. It is always quiet and we never hear people in rooms around us or above us. They just build those motels really well... They have no smoking FLOORS. And most of the time, they are VERY reasonably priced. Try one sometime.

Hugs,
Betsy

Bernie said...

I have lived through everything you did on your travels. This summer when I arrived at a pre booked hotel I had a horrible experience....when I opend the door to my room I could hardly breathe for the smoke (and this a non smoking room) when I went to the desk and told them I couldn't stay there she wanted to charge me anyway.....she couldn't and I didn't but it was stressful for awhile.
I laughed at the beanie babies as my nice has so many on her back window....it has warmed up here tremendously.....:-) Hugs

The Retired One said...

Loree: Men don't get that we do that, do they?

Sue: I never flip anyone off for doing it, but I sure would like to have a big sign that I could put up in my window that says: Why are YOU so special that you get to go ahead of everyone else?". ha

Jeannette: Why do you get up so early to get on the road? (Just curious). The traffic really isn't that much lighter then is it? Yes, I am thrilled too that Michigan has passed legislation to limit smoking in public places...it is so much better going into restaurants, isn't it? My daughter has asthma and when she was little we had to leave in the middle of a meal because the smoke bothered her breathing so much. I might have offended a smoker with my post, tho..I dropped from 201 to 200 followers today.

Alan: Glad you liked it! (smiles)

Ashley: we are back now, but I have been struggling with my computer for days now and can't get my memory to let me even save pictures to a CD. I am in big trouble and sinking fast. I am going to have to pay someone to help, I think.

Roshni: Yes,you are right. If no one let them in for a few hours, maybe they would "get it" next time they tried to do it again. But those types rarely do "get it" do they?

Eva: yes, the three thousand of us polite ones "get it" but unfortunately those people do not.

Jientje: You are welcome for the recipe, did you make it yet? did you like it? I felt so bad that I couldn't get my emails to send out until I got back from vacation...but at least I got that part solved on my laptop. Now if I could get my picture dilemma fixed I would be a happy girl.

Brian: Just be glad I didn't use the TP FOR a towel. ha I would STILL have those little shreds of paper hanging on me.

Betsy: We hated Holiday Inn's in years past, but maybe the Holiday Inn Express's have improved now and we need to give them a shot. We actually had some chances this trip to stay in them, but due to our past bad experiences we passed them by. I will try them next time on your advice and see if they have improved, as it sounds like they have.

Kearsie said...

Oh man Joan, you are RIGHT!! What is UP with all that?

Also, I hope you had a gigantic ball and enjoyed your time with your daughter!!

And finally I think I need to learn that finger move b/c I only end up shredding half the roll.

Lesley said...

I'm with ya on the towel thing! And what's up with the hotel bathrooms with no exhaust fan?? Everything ends up damp and moldy including the one little soggy towel. eww

grannyann said...

You hit the nail on the head.

Shelley said...

This made me laugh! Great observations! I too have wondered about the 4 am people - where the heck are they going? Maybe we should follow them....

Ratty said...

I think those 4am people are vampires. That's why they have to move while it's still dark. I'd make sure the doors are all locked and the blinds are all closed.

The Lucy and Dick Show said...

What normally happens to us in hotels is the guy who had the room beside us sets the alarm clock for yesterday and it goes off today at 4 in the morning and Dick has to call the front desk to get the night clerk to come up and turn it off!

J.J. in L.A. said...

Re: #4 - my mom will nearly cause an accident while trying NOT to let a "sneaker" (as she calls them) in. It's pretty funny to watch their frustration. I've never seen so many 'one finger salutes' in my life. lol!

Blissed-Out Grandma said...

We had one of those high-heels-from-hell-at-6 a.m. situations last time we traveled, and it drove me crazy. It sounded like the whole room above us had a tile floor, and this person click-clacked from one end to the other time and again, pausing only to let me fall back to sleep before waking me again. Aarrgghh.

Ramblin Mama said...

We, too, travel well together. Good thing as we've made three cross-country drives this year alone, not to mention quite a few weekend runs of 200-600 miles one way. I agree with the pushy driver comments 100%. Our neighborhood is surrounded by road construction at the moment and I see it every time I leave the house. Those must be the same "special" folks who also park in the parcel pick-up lane at the market. The towel shortage is my biggest complaint about the hotels along the way, too. I have long hair and a large body. Maybe they could cut out the hand towels and give extra bath towels instead. We are some of those 4 a.m. folks (but we do try very hard to be quiet. We do it as we try to cover 700-750 miles a day on a lot of our trips so we either have to go early or late. And yes, traffic is often that much better! We live just off I-95 and it is much worse after 6 a.m.

The Retired One said...

Bernie: How awful! I think the only way to stop people from smoking in hotel rooms is to install extremely sensitive smoke alarms that will go off if they light up.

Kearsie: That finger move has taken me YEARS to perfect. ha Yes, it was wonderful seeing my daughter. If only the weather would have cooperated. And now? I can't get my pictures downloaded, the dang computer that I have the tools to do it has crashed, along with SEVERAL of my older pictures. I am crushed.

Lesley: I forgot about that one! You are correct...there were at least three of them that had a fan but obviously no vent because it stayed steamy the whole time. A few didn't even have fans.

Grannyann: So glad I just wasn't a crabby traveler and others experience the same frustrations.

Shelley: They say it is to beat the traffic, but for me, travel is about the adventure and seeing things in DAYLIGHT. What fun is it to drive in the dark???

Ratty: Maybe THAT is it. I will wear my can't-smell-my-blood perfume then! :-}

Lucy and Dick: yep, heard THAT once too. That is what wake up calls are for, no? Although I was shocked one day because I called the desk and asked for a wakeup call at one hotel and they said "I'm sorry, we don't do that here". I was shocked.

JJ: It is so funny that people flip each other off...I never do that while driving. (I have felt like it, though) ha

Blissed: Don't you ever wonder what they are doing? Just ONCE I am going to get dressed, go up and knock on the door and ask them. ha

Ramblin: the only thing about traveling that many miles and getting up so early and traveling is that you must have to travel in the dark...and miss so many things you get to see in daylight when you travel. For me, the most fun part of the trips is seeing/catching things as you travel. We never travel in the dark...we just take a couple extra days to get there instead so we can go in the daylight and stop at sunset. You are lucky to be able to take so many trips, though...just hope you get to enjoy them...traveling that many miles a day would only exhaust me.

RNSANE said...

I just discovered your blog because of the "collection" Sharkbytes put together. It is absolutely marvelous. Being a not so happy retiree this year ( the city and county of San Francisco eliminated my forensic nursing position of 21 years ), I need all I can find to cheer me up and your blog is certainly helpful in that arena!

Cathy Clementz said...

NOW you know why it is so nice to be camping in your own home (AKA RV). But some of those things about people on the road and what they are transporting under those tarps, etc...yep, makes ya wonder. I don't miss staying in a motel at all. Where DO you come up with these perfect pictures to go along with each comment???

Sara said...

I knwo what your talking about, my Hubby and I always end up with the early noisy raisers, it drievs me nuts, and we always end up on a hotel when there is a big group of girls or boys for sports, so loud and giggly

The Retired One said...

RNsane: I love the name of your blog...and welcome aboard to mine! I am so glad you found my blog. I usually do a lot of photography, but my computer that has most of my editing programs on it has crashed and I am hung up a few days without being able to post them. I am going crazy waiting to post more pictures!!
You will find that you will love retirement! (Even if it was forced). I don't know how I worked all those years now that I am off. ha Looking forward to having you visit often and leave comments! I will stop by and visit your blog soon.

Cathy: Go to www.fotosearch.com to find pix for your comments...it is the best site I have found..they have a lot of royalty free ones and a huge collection. Just go to the search engine and type in what you want and it pops up with a ton of choices...I LOVE it.

Sara: We haven't met up with any sports teams in hotels, but I can just imagine the noise and fun they want to have when staying at a hotel and hiding from their chaperones. ha

Life with Kaishon said...

What a great blog. I saw your comment above me at The Pioneer Woman today and I came over to say hi : ) Nice to meet you! Hope your travels over Christmas are wonderful and you don't have to deal with too many high heel wearers above you :)

The Retired One said...

Life: Thanks so much!! Please join on as a Follower if you haven't already, I would LOVE that!! We recently traveled to Florida and that will be it for a few weeks..we may go down towards Chicago next week for a quick trip to see my eldest daughter, but we won't be staying in any motels. ha
Please make sure you join the blog and I look forward to many more comments from you. I will check out your blog too!

SquirrelQueen said...

You hit all of my pet peeves for road travel, #4 being at the top of my list. I will do everything short of causing an accident to not let them in.

Hotels, we have one favorite chain (because of the points) and so far so good on everything. I usually ask for the top floor or outside corner room.

Sorry about the computer problems, if I lived closer I would help for free.

The Retired One said...

SquirrelQueen: I just joined one of those chain hotel/awards dealies on this trip...so now we will see if it is better if we always stay in those types of hotels each time we travel.
I get my computer back tomorrow, so keep your fingers crossed for me...he already told me he found some of my photos and I think he found ALL of them...gosh, I hope so!! He is going to add a few programs to make saving future photos onto my external hard drive easier too, so that will make me feel better for the future!!

Claudia's thoughts said...

Just found your blog and I am having a laughing good time reading it. In reference to item #2. I had the pleasure (???) to be awakened by two people getting it on at 3 AM one morning. I think they thought they were at home or were having a tryst and did not care if the made noise. I was just wishing one of the would hurry up and not try for a hat trick.

The Retired One said...

Claudia: Welcome to my blog, I am so glad you found it!
Yes, isn't the hotel experience one of many different adventures? Then you see your "neighbors" the next day and they both look like librarians or something. ha

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I retired in June 2008 and started my blog in November 2008. I worked at several jobs as a Registered Nurse prior to retirement. I LOVE being retired! Blogging has offered me a whole new venue to start writing again and to share new hobbies such as gardening, birdwatching and sharing my nature photography. If you like my blog, PLEASE click on "follow this blog". Having a lot of followers reading my blog gives me incentive to continue to do photography and to continue to write. I also LOVE comments, so I encourage you to leave me a comment after you read my posts. Thanks everyone, for taking the time to read me!!

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